Ending a friendship is never easy, but sometimes necessary. We help you make the right decision and show how you can diverge respectfully.
If we are unhappy and dissatisfied in a love relationship, this often leads to a separation. Maybe there is a big bang or a small sound insight that it just doesn’t work. In any case, the end of a partnership is very difficult and emotional.
But what if we feel uncomfortable in a friendship? When should we stick to this relationship and how do we see that the signs are on separation? And how exactly is that possible: end a friendship?
End friendship: do not act rash
Ending a friendship is a decision that is not so easy to undo. You put another person in their barriers and injure them with it. Therefore, you should not deal lightly with this decision and never act rash.
If you are very upset right now, take some time to arrange your thoughts and feelings. Negative emotions such as anger or disappointment are often bad consultants. Breathe deeply, go somewhat at a distance. Then you should consider whether it is really better to draw a line.
Reflect in peace for you: What is the trigger that you question friendship? Is it a violent argument or is it constant conflicts? Maybe you have the feeling that you place different expectations of friendship or that you simply have nothing to say.
These reasons speak for ending the friendship
Is a violent dispute the trigger that you want to end your friendship? Then think about the following:
- It sounds trite, but two people always belong to a dispute. Even if it is difficult – consider what responsibility you carry for the dispute. Were you unfair or hurtful? Did you hit a sore point and therefore provoke a conflict?
- Is the reason for your dispute greater and more important than your friendship? Has the trigger shattered your trust so much that you can’t forgive? Or can you both look into the eye anyway?
- Even if you are close friends, you don’t always have to be of the same opinion. Is it possible that you will find a compromise? Can you agree that you have different views? Is it possible to avoid the topic in the future or to discuss objectively? If so, what would be necessary?
Persistent conflicts in friendship are no less stressful. Before you draw a line, question your situation:
- What are the reasons for this tense mood between you? Is there a big topic or many smaller points where you pile up?
- If your friend has other views than you, it can be irritating. But mutual respect and tolerance can open up great opportunities to learn from each other and grow together.
- Do you feel like you are in a toxic friendship?
A friendship can also be stressful if both people make different ideas and expectations. Make the following aware:
- Don’t you feel comfortable because you have no friendship at eye level? Think about how the imbalance comes about. Of course, you can also ask the other person how he or she sees and evaluates your friendship. So you can take both sides into account.
- At friend: Inside you should be able to rely on that they are there for you. This means that you celebrate the great sides of life with you, but are also reliable in bad times and stand by you. Can this friendship offer you or do you both expect different things?
- It is often stressful if one person invests much more in friendship and wishes more closer contact than the other. In this case, it is particularly important to look for the conversation. So you can avoid rejections and injuries.
Are you considering ending friendship because you just have nothing to say? Then take the following into account:
- Do you have known each other for a very long time and have simply developed in different directions? This is not bad at all and a normal process. In the course of our lives we have so many companions: inside – very few and special friendships survive decades.
- Make sure you just want to remember the time together. Perhaps you want to end the friendship because you meet together or invitations are forced.
- Think about whether it is enough to simply reduce the contact. For example, you can congratulate yourself for a birthday or greet yourself on the street without feeling deep obligations.
End friendship: How can you proceed
You decided that you want to end a friendship. Both sides are best helped when the “separation” runs fairly and undramatically. Here are some tips on how to end with friend: inside if you still have a lot of contact:
- Pulling a final line by messenger is just as inappropriate between friends as with the end of a love affair. The personal conversation is the most unpleasant but best variant to end a friendship.
- Wait for the right moment. If your: e friend: in person in person in a deep crisis, you should rather postpone the confrontation.
- Please your: E friend: In a conversation in four eyes and in a neutral place.
- “I feel your behavior as …”
- “It hurt me if …”
If a conversation is not possible, then end your friendship with a personal letter (not by SMS or text message). In this case, too, make sure to stay fair and not with allegations to throw you. Explain your view and waive justifications. You should also end the letter with how you imagine your future contact.
It is not always necessary to end a friendship with a conversation. If you hardly hear from each other and there are no larger unexplained conflicts between you, you can simply let the contact run in the sand.
Revised by Philipp Multhaupt
Read more on utopia.de:
- Forgive and forgive: Why it is good for you and your relationships
- Be alone: ​​how you can handle it well
- Maintain friendships: This is how old and new friendships work – even on a distance
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