Summer is the season when most people go on vacation. When the hustle and bustle of everyday life falls away, relaxation spreads and allows the mind to calm down, sort out your thoughts and indulge in self-reflection. But self-reflection is not only a good way to gain more self-confidence and mental health during the holidays.
A few days or weeks break from everyday life, relax, lie on the beach or in the outdoor pool. Mild evenings and nights lure you outside, the hustle and bustle of normal life falls away and relaxation spreads. In conversation with friends or in our own thoughts, we listen to frogs and chirping crickets and often start to think about ourselves and our lives as the stress subsides. Self-reflection that can arise from the holiday mood.
But self-reflection shouldn’t just be left to the mild summer nights. Questioning and rethinking yourself, your own behavior and the decisions you have made is an important step for your own personal development. Those who take a critical look at their actions and work in society treat themselves and their fellow human beings more carefully. In this way, we are not only better able to take care of ourselves and our (physical and mental) health, but also to help others and to survive social crises more easily.
What does self-reflection mean?
The best way to understand what is behind self-reflection is to break the word down into its two parts, “self” and “reflection”. The “self” means one’s own person with all its facets. Strengths as well as one’s own weaknesses, preferences, dislikes and talents, psychological and physical characteristics. “Self” also means experiences that have been made. Things that we have learned or socio-cultural values, everything that defines us as individuals. “Reflection” comes from “to reflect” and means something like reflecting, referring back. Self-reflection therefore means thinking about oneself, one’s own behavior, one’s motives, but also one’s own effect on the immediate and indirect environment.
Without self-reflection there is no (personal) growth
Self-reflection lets us search for our goals and desires. We learn to understand what drives us or prevents us from making progress. We question how we deal with our fellow human beings and the reactions to a certain situation. As a result, we become more mindful, live more consciously and thoughtfully, are less controlled by impulses and not so much at the mercy of our emotions. Only if we reflect on our actions can we learn from mistakes and thereby develop personally.
Self-reflection also helps us to deal better with crises and conflicts. For example, by asking ourselves whether a certain deck chair on the beach that someone else snatched from under our noses is really that important, or whether it is just representative of a completely different problem. Self-reflection is therefore also a form of “mental hygiene” that is good for our mental health. If you think about yourself and your behavior, you get to know yourself better bit by bit and can unmask possible (health or psychological) difficulties at an early stage.
Not only do we benefit from this, but also our entire environment. An example of this is a conflict at work, with customers or colleagues. Being self-reflective here helps to react less emotionally and to approach the problem with factual arguments, which can ensure that a solution is found that is suitable for everyone involved. However, self-reflection also ensures that we can enjoy our free time at home after work, because we have analyzed the situation and finished with it. This is important for our psyche, which needs recovery phases after mental exertion just as much as our body does.
How does self-reflection work? Can this be learned?
The ability for self-reflection in a narrow sense is something that only humans possess. Although animals also learn from their mistakes (a dog that has burned its snout on a hot piece of metal will avoid this spot in the future), animals do not question the “why” of their actions. This ability is even less developed in young children. The older we get, the more often we begin to reflect on our actions and the reactions of others to them. But targeted self-reflection goes beyond that and, as the name suggests, deals with all aspects of the “self”.
There are basically two ways of doing this: oral and written. A good starting point is the verbal variant, in which questions are deliberately asked and answered in a soliloquy. These questions deal with oneself, for example what goals one has, what drives one, where the priorities lie or what weaknesses and strengths one can recognize in oneself. Various mindfulness exercises and meditation techniques, such as those taught in the online meditation course of the Techniker Krankenkasse, can support this. However, sometimes it takes a good conversation, whether with friends, family or therapists, to get feedback on a particular situation. This can also be a form of self-reflection.
Two ways to reflect on your own self
In written self-reflection, the most important questions and the thoughts on them are written down on a piece of paper. This offers the opportunity to take up the answers again at a later point in time and to recognize changes or patterns in behavior and thus learn more about yourself and your personality.
For the first attempts at self-reflection, whether in thoughts, in conversation or on paper, it can be useful to use the “hand method” as a guide. The thumb stands for “thinking”, the index finger for “goal achievement”, the middle finger for “mental status” (How do I feel?), the ring finger for “advice” (How have I helped others?) and the little finger for Body (What do I do for myself and my health?).
Gather insights, don’t judge!
In dealing with the self, however, we must never forget that this is not a matter of judgment. In self-reflection, knowledge is only collected and one’s own actions are analyzed. So there can be no “negative” result here either. Mistakes are necessary because we can only learn from them. If we are not comfortable with the result of our self-analysis, this is an ideal starting point for making changes. Techniques such as the WOOP method, which you can learn in the online course at Techniker Krankenkasse, for example, can help to realize your own projects, so that your self-image has changed for the better after just a few weeks.
Self-reflection – a central building block for mental health
Self-reflection, thinking about and becoming aware of one’s own motives, behavior, reactions and goals is a central component of personal development. If we understand why we act, how we act and how we affect others as a result, we can do good for ourselves and others. By being more mindful and attentive to ourselves and our environment, we strengthen our psyche, overcome crises more easily and not only live better, but also healthier.
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