Learn serenity: helpful tips

Learning serenity means avoiding impulsive, rash action and getting more inner calm over the head. We want to show you how this can work with these tips.

Serenity has a lot to leave, let go, let peace and mean something like inner peace. Especially when letting go, the key to more serenity is. The most important tool for this is the head, because so that you become more relaxed, a rethink has to take place. On the way there, it is important that you make yourself aware of the situations in which you act inserly and reflexively and learn to free yourself from it.

Little serenity? Find causes

Has lack of serenity for a long time or only recently? Is it too much stress, environmental factors or is it something that is based in your nature? Are you naturally more of a thin -skinned or impulsive person?

If you can answer these questions, you are a big step further. Because depending on the cause, the path to more serenity can look very different. In order to find the right way and to learn serenity, it is important that you recognize stress symptoms early. In the long run, the stress in the body can spread and lead to increasing stress.

Learn serenity: structure

Have you identified stress as a cause of a lack of serenity? An effective remedy for stress is structure. Make a fixed schedule for your day or week. Design it in such a way that it can also be mastered. And important: Breaks are also part of this schedule, because the learning of serenity also includes taking a deep breath and pause.

Also plan time in which you explicitly do nothing or just something that relaxes you and gives you pleasure. During this time, avoid all thoughts of what you still have to do. For example, you can use the EAT-The-Frog approach or keep a bullet journal to work more efficiently.

But if there is work on the program, then do not press yourself in front of it, but take care of your tasks conscientiously and do not let yourself be distracted by smartphones and the like. Studies show that after a look at the smartphone you need five minutes to find your way back to your actual task. A good self -organization can help you work productively and concentrated.

A spatial separation can also be helpful: deliberately choose a place where you work and one where you relax. This can be different rooms, but also just desk and sofa. It is important that you don’t mix the rooms.

Be mindful for serenity

Due to the lack of serenity due to stress, too much thinking can be. Often we are caught in our thoughts on yesterday, tomorrow and the day after tomorrow that we completely forget the moment we are in.

Mindfulness training or mindfulness meditation can help to learn serenity here. These techniques support you in living more at the moment and planning less, thinking and worrying. This also makes you more relaxed. The basic message of serenity is: The moment is what it is – without evaluating it. He doesn’t have to be good, bad, great, successful, but is okay as it is.

Nowadays you can learn mindfulness in many ways: There are many books, among other things, from the mindfulness “inventor” Jon Kabat-Zinn, CDs or apps for the cell phone such as headspace. Mindfulness courses are also offered in most cities.

Learn serenity: take the pressure from you

What applies to the moment also applies to you and your fellow human beings. Try not to force anything, but take on and your fellow human beings as you are. This does not mean that you should accept everything, but we often screw our expectations too high. This creates pressure and as a result of stress and dissatisfaction and none is helped.

To learn serenity, start questioning your own expectations: do you really have to be so high? Why do you have to be so high?

Make sure what is really important to you. Often expectations create a completely wrong picture of what we really want. If you accept yourself as you are, you put yourself under pressure. Then you can be more relaxed and value yourself more. You then radiate this attitude outwards.

An exercise to reduce pressure may be to write down every day in the evening what you like about what you did well today or what you can be grateful for today. This directs your view of the positive and way of stress.

Write to let go

Writing can be an aid to more serenity. It is often much easier for us to structure and reflect on our thoughts when we put them on paper. Try it out and use paper in the following situations as a tool for more serenity:

• If you are dissatisfied with a situation or a person, write down why and how you feel. This is healthier when these feelings to eat.
• Do you have the feeling that you have to throw a thousand things on your head? Many quarrels only make more dissatisfied. Instead, write a letter in which you drain steam – but think about whether you really send it – are it predominantly allegations or rather constructive criticism? How would the other react to it?
• As recommended above: make schedules and write down what is important. You no longer have to keep everything on paper and you can’t forget it.
• You can also write about all other feelings, not just about anger and anger. Writing helps you to deal with it carefully and maybe direct your thoughts in a completely different direction.

In short, writing can be a tool to learn serenity.

Communicate for more serenity

Nevertheless: not talking about stress and problems, does not make more relaxed. It is not about you freezing everything into yourself. If things interfere with your partner, your colleague or a friend, talk to her or him about it. But try to formulate a relaxed conversation situation and try to formulate what bothers you and how you could defuse the situation.

Formulations such as “I feel like this” or “I perceive it so much” are helpful here. Try to respond to your counterpart and make it clear to him that you want to work with him to improve a situation. It is important that the other person does not feel attacked.

Talking is also a form of letting go – and with a little practice solution -oriented.

Take a deep breath and stay calm

Are you angry and would like to shout someone out loudly? A remark has hurt you and brings you closer to tears?

Then take a deep breath – once, twice, three times. In this respiratory exercise, imagine the negative feelings flow out of your body with your breath. Before you answer, pause and count silently up to ten, then consider again whether you want to give the answer. Is this specific situation really reason for your anger, grief or inner unrest? Or is the cause somewhere else? Is there a better time to discuss this?

Also take a look at the larger context. Is the problem really so huge or does it appear to you at the moment?

More serenity with sports, music and tea

Many of us sit in the office for many hours every day, drive home after working by car, sit at dinner, sit in front of the television. We often neglect the needs of our body and it builds up a lot of unused energy.

Are you one of the people who sit a lot? Then make sure how you can sit properly and try to incorporate exercises that help with long sitting into your everyday life. Yoga while sitting can also help.

But of course only exercises while sitting do not help. It is best to go for a long walk and watch the recurring run of nature over the seasons, power you get out properly with a round of jogging or go swimming. It has been proven that sport ensures that we are more balanced and more relaxed – and therefore more relaxed.

Music can also be very helpful as acute aid in a stressful situation. Set a “serenity playlist” with songs that bring you down again when you are stressed or irritated and that help you to relax.

Even a hot cup of tea, which you enjoy in peace, may help you take the moment more relaxed.

Read more on Utopia:

• Self -doubt: tips on how you can overcome them
• Breathing exercises: You should know these exercises
• Reduce stress: 7 tips on how to slow down your life

Revised by Lena Kirchner

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